There was a bit of confusion in the off-licence this morning. When I was ready to pay for my whisky, the check-out assistant said to me, ‘Strip down facing me.’ Making a mental note to complain to my Member of Parliament about
excessive security running amok, I did just as she had instructed. When the hysterical shrieking and alarms finally subsided, I found out that she was referring to my debit card. I have been asked to shop elsewhere in the future.