If this story doesn’t make you cry out from laughter, just let me know and next time I will have you in my prayers!
This story is about an old couple that had been together for many years. There was only one friction in their relation after all these years, being that the man always had the habit of farting really loud just after waking up. Because of the ‘noise’ his wife then wakes up and start complaining about the smell making her grasp for air and her eyes becoming watery. Every day she would plead with him to stop doing that every morning because it was making her sick to the stomack. He just said that he couldn’t help it and it was a normal natural thing that can happen to everybody. She asked him to please see a doctor, because she was affraid that he would blow out his guts one day.
As the years went by, the man didn’t stop ripping them out. But then, one christmas morning, while she was preparing dinner for that christmas evening, while he was still upstairs and sound asleep, she had a good look at the turkeys innards, neck, gizzard, liver and all the other ‘spare parts of the turkey and came up with a malicious idea. She took the turkey guts and placed them in a bowl. She took the bowl up where her man was still sound asleep. She pulled back the covers and then carefully pulled back the elastic waistband of her husbands underpants. She then emptied the bowl with turkey guts into his shorts making sure she didn’t wake him up…
Some time later she heard that her husband woke up with his daily routine of trumpeting. But this time it was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of him running to the bath room… The woman could hardly control herself from laughing out loud while she was rolling on the floor with tears in her eyes from laughter. She reckoned that after years of his torture she finally got him back real good.
After about 25 minutes later, the husband came down the stairs with a look of horror on his now grey face while his underpants were covered with blood. She asked him, while she bit her lips, what happened to you hunny?
Well honey, he said, you were right all along. You’ve been warning me all these years but I didn’t listen to you. What do you mean? she asked. Well he said; you always said that one day I would end up with my guts out because of the farting right? She said yes and? Well, he continued; you were completely right and today it really happened! The wife said; then we should go to a doctor as soon as possible then. The man replied; don’t worry my dear, cause by the grace of God, with some vasaline and two fingers I managed to get most of them back in!